get lost...

i reminisced today.

i took a bus.

i ran-jogged to the end of the street, ran-sprinted across it, flashed my official mcmaster student ID card (without the smallest flinching of guilt) and stepped onto the 35 college bus.

and, what do you know, i miss it.

i like the official feel of taking the bus, there is something of a purpose to it.
truthfully, it makes me feel a little more grown up. like i have places to go, and things i must be doing.
things of importantance and independence,

today i took the bus to the library.
and as i plunked myself down in between the bookshelves on the third floor non-fiction section, pulling book after book of designs, patterns, motifs, and william morris of the shelf, i was suddenly most glad that i am going to be going to school for textiles.

it was nice to feel excited again. i had begun to feel a little uncertain, and uncertainty has a horrible little way sucking up all good things in life.

uncertainty, tonight however, was easily tackled by library balconies, night bus rides, light rain & streetlights, the book of blue flowers, a cute boy, homeward directed walk, make-shift chai tea lattes, and late night t.v.

i most thoroughly enjoy crushing uncertainty, even if only for the smallest of moments.
it deserves it absolutely.


...and then get found